Spike Bike

Since some people are talking guns and bikes in the previous post, I thought I’d bring up Bob Fishell’s old “Spike Bike” stories from the late 80s.

Bob wrote those stories in 1988 and 1989. One story was published in an issue of the now-defunct Cyclist magazine.

Bob told me a short while ago that cycling has changed, but motorists and politicians (mostly) have not. “The only thing that’s really changed,” says Bob, “is the vehicles the perps use. Spike, in his worst nightmare, could not have envisioned the proliferation of Navigators, Escalades, H2s, and Denalis now clogging the roads.”

“For my part, I still ride several days a week,” Bob continues. “And I still wish I had a rocket launcher with me.”

For your reading enjoyment, I present the Spike Bike Introduction.

With all the acrimony that’s been passed around about bikes vs. cars, I thought it would be a good time to talk about a really interesting ride….

It was a Friday. Fridays are usually good days because you have a lot of teenagers drinking and driving, plus a lot of people who are in a bad mood and in a hurry to get home from work. The factories usually pay on Friday, so you get a fair number of beer-commercial types cruising around in their 4X4s looking for some butt to kick while they’re knocking back a few brews. A cyclist’s paradise.

I stuck a full mag in my MAC-10 and put another one under the saddle. The gun fits into the water bottle cage pretty well, and it’s fairy light. I stuffed a couple of grenades in my jersey pockets and slipped my Rambo-knife into its sheath on the front fork. Just for good measure, I grabbed a thermite grenade and dropped it into the remaining jersey pocket. This is a little more weight than I usually carry, but it was Friday night after all.

Read more: Spike Bike Introduction.

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