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Two things I’d never want: a Huffy or a Stalker

by Ted Johnson

I saw this bike outside of a Supercuts yesterday. A Huffy Stalker.

Is there a creepier model name for any mass-produced bike? I’ve spent half an hour Googling this, and I can’t find anyone else who found this bike’s name a little disturbing.

Huffy Stalker DS

What were they thinking?

Perhaps other bloggers are smart enough not to want their websites search-indexed for the words “stalker” and “creepy.” (Great. That ought to bring in the the kind of traffic we want.)

Over the weekend, I’ve been thinking about iconic brands. (For reasons to be revealed in a forthcoming bike review.)

I’m no bike snob. (I think the Web already has one of those.) But isn’t Huffy the iconic bad bike?

Yet the brand has survived this long-standing stigma, as well as being driven into bankruptcy with help from Wal-Mart.

Even Blackwater changed it’s name to Xe, after it’s original name became synonymous with “private mercenary army” and “human rights abuses.” (Okay, maybe Huffy’s brand-name problems aren’t that bad.)

Huffy’s response seems to be: Fight for survival and keep on making bikes. And they double down with disturbing bike names.

The Freddie Krueger of bike brands.

In a way, you’ve got to admire that.

 
Burley nomad 229

11 Responses to “Two things I’d never want: a Huffy or a Stalker”

  1. Nate says:

    Huffy is definitely a strange bird. Synonymous with consistently poor quality, yet also consistently made in USA for decades. don’t know if they still are…

  2. BluesCat says:

    I dunno, Ted.

    I find the Cannondale Perp, the GT Psyclone and the Pinarello Dogma just as disturbing!

  3. Perhaps other bloggers are smart enough not to want their websites search-indexed for the words “stalker” and “creepy.

    FWIW, Google Trends says stalker has about 4x more search activity than creepy and that most of it comes (interestingly enough) from Russia.

    That’s not as creepy as it might sound,though: Apparently, “stalker” is Russian slang for urban scavengers. It’s also the name of a Russian FPS game that takes place in the exclusion zone around Chernobyl.

  4. Adam says:

    Anyone else who cares enough about bike to blog about them quit reading after the word “huffy” and thus never discovered the model name.

  5. chuck says:

    If your memory goes back 50 – 60 years, Horace M. Huffman’s HUFFMAN MANUFACTURING, CO. was an icon of the better sort. Standing beside companies like Mercury, Rollfast, Columbia and Schwinn. They’ve definately chosen a differnt path; Schwinn (in name) is their only peer still in business.

  6. Matt says:

    Yeah there’s a lot of history behind the Huffy name but sadly its just another cheap Chinese import today.

  7. chunkymonkeybiker says:

    Aren’t they just stickers? Didn’t Greg Lemond ride a Huffy in the Tour?

  8. Matt Brown says:

    Greg Lamond was sponsored by Huffy, however the bikes he rode were actually real bikes made by other smaller legit frame builders…that were re-branded as Hufffy, and not actually made by them. He actually hated the brand, and was often publicly critical of Huffy for making junk, even though they sponsored him. Apparently he had a problem with talking smack about his sponsors as he also talked trash about Trek for supporting and covering up the whole Lance Armstrong doping thing. In a way I respect him for having morals, and sticking to his guns..however unwise to trash the company that pays you.

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