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2012 Academy Award Nominees on Bikes

by Ted Johnson

Okay, I’ve spent the last hour looking through this year’s Oscar Nominees in the acting and directing categories and doing Google Image searches to see who might be candidates for my effort to get someone to arrive to the event by bike.

Yes, that means I just spent an hour, on the clock, looking at celebrities. Some people would say that means I have the most awesome job in the world. I, however, feel as though I’m being paid to pick my nose.

I try not to be a smug cyclist, but in my disdain for celebrity worship in our culture, oh yes, I can feel quite uppity. And this… this exercise makes me feel dirty. In my bike-friendly workplace, one thing we don’t have is a shower.

If I could wave a magic wand over a non-cycling, celebrity-addicted person, and get them to either start cycling, or stop caring about celebrities — but not both — I honestly don’t know which I’d choose.

I have issues. I own it. On with it.

As if to prove the stereotype that the only reasons people would ride bikes for transportation are that they (a) got a DUI, (b) are insane, or (c) both, I found Nick Nolte (sigh) on a recumbent.

Nick Nolte

Photo: NameOnRice.com

Now this is more like it. If Michelle Williams were to arrive at the Oscars on a classic 70′s three-speed with a banana seat, there would be a stampede the next day to every pawn shop in the country, and anyone with one of these bikes in their garage would be uploading images to eBay within hours. (And sullying myself with celebrity culture would all have been worth it.)

Michelle Williams

Photo: listal

Here’s George Clooney, who would make a fine ambassador for the mainstreaming of bike commuting — provided he does not arrive on a mountain bike while wearing basketball attire.

George Clooney

Photo: UsMagazine.com via BikeSnobNYC.com

Finally, I found Brad Pitt with Angelina Jolie with their kids Maddox and Zahara. (The bike child trailer experts with whom I work believe that is a Burley trailer they are pulling.)

Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Maddox Zahara.

Photo: People.com via TreeHugger.com

My original appeal to entertainers included this illustration of the Pitt-Jolie entourage:

What if Angelina and Brad couldn’t get a babysitter? (full)

Illustration by Matthew Henry Hall

Making me feel as though I’ve been on the right track all along.

Those are all of the photos of nominees I was able to find without spending more of my employers time. I am not necessarily fixated on having a nominee arrive at the Oscars on a bike, but the list of nominees gave me a manageable list from which to work.

If you’d like to pick up where I left off — and waste your employers money — here are links to the Google Image searches I used for every nominee:

Let me know what you find.

 
Burley nomad 229

16 Responses to “2012 Academy Award Nominees on Bikes”

  1. Here’s Ewan McGregor (he’s in the movie Beginners) on a fixie it looks like going old school.

    http://cdn.crushable.com/files/2011/03/110317L4_MCGREGOR_B_GR_02.jpg

    Ewan McGregor

  2. JonO says:

    I noticed the ‘too cool for a helmet’ look is big with the Hollywood crowd. Poor examples they are!

  3. Tom Bowden says:

    The truth is revealed – BluesCat’s true identity is: Nick Nolte!

  4. Chris Iversen says:

    Not a Fixie, check the rear hub and shifter, but pretty cool bike. Helmets are cool too though!

  5. BoulderLisaS says:

    I’m game, I’ll try and help out. I love the idea. What about Leonardo DiCaprio – isn’t he a progressive environmentalist.

  6. Graham says:

    This one time, I touched my bicycle without a helmet and I was instantly killed.

    It sucked.

  7. BluesCat says:

    Tom – Bwahahaha! Though, I haveta admit, there have been some Sunday mornings where I KNOW I musta looked like Nick Nolte’s mug shot the night before!

    Michelle Williams as Marilyn gets MY vote. You seen her on the cover of the latest GQ? M’God! Makes me so weak in the knees … good thing I rode the A2B Metro electric to work today or I might not have the strength to make it home!

    (See that, Ted? Now, how GOOD am I at keeping the comments here ON TOPIC about bike commuting, and AWAY from seeing this site sink to a level of prurient perniciousness!)

  8. Ben says:

    Brad is pulling a “walmart special” trailer and not a Burley as previously speculated…..http://www.ibike.org/education/brangelina-bike-ride-1222-4.jpg

    Schwinn Trailer

  9. JonO says:

    @Graham – truth be told, I roll with no helmet my last 1/4 mile to work after I shower at the gym because I don’t want to mess up the golden locks. I’m ashamed. I’m the badboy of bike commuting

  10. I think the child co-stars of Hugo would be perfect choices for arriving at the Oscars on bike. For one thing, they are too young to drive cars. For a second, their characters were from an era in which people (those of the European persuasion in particular) often arrived at their destination on a bike. And finally, they would look so, so charming arriving at the red carpet on bike, a couple of Dutch bikes, perhaps.

    What about Glenn Close from Albert Hobbs?? Also, a slower, bike friendlier era. The entire cast of The Artist?

    • Ted Johnson says:

      I think I’m going to disagree with you, Karen.

      The arrival Oscar attendees on bike needs to be anything but cute, quaint, eccentric, or whimsical. It needs to be stylish. It needs to signal to the celebrity-mongering public, Yes, your royalty considers this a valid form of transportation. Any frivolity undermines that message.

      Look at me getting all control-freaky and invested in this idea. Perspective, Ted. Perspective.

  11. Ellen says:

    Awesome idea… I love it.

    I just shared your link on our page to see if we can help generate interest in your research.

    I agree with your views that the bicycle should be considered a valid form of transportation for this famous population; it must also fit into said celebrity’s ethos to make the most impact.

    I personally like the idea of using the Social Network crew, like Jesse Eisenberg, Rooney Mara, or Justin Timberlake.

  12. Drew says:

    I just saw this in the sidebar of the main page here:
    http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nba-ball-dont-lie/lebron-james-rode-bike-ballgame-sunday-210120523.html

    LeBron James rides a bike to a game. It made quite a few headlines, and a lot of people posted positive comments about it. He also said he’s done it a few times before too. I think this is a great start, and would be even better if a few more celebrities are shown riding a bike for transportation.

  13. Lindsay says:

    I still can’t believe that Lebron James actualy road a bike to his game. Kudos to him, I might have to change my perception of Lebron.

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